Life Lessons Garnered from Using an ‘Old School’ BBQ Smoker
BBQ is Coming!
It was relatively light and fairly inexpensive. The kind that one might refer to as an ‘entry level model’. I picked it up from the previous owner and loaded it into my good ole Isuzu Rodeo. On my way home I began to make promises to it. “Together we will make incredible foods and memories”. I was now the proud owner of an old school, barrel shaped smoker. I stopped on the way home that day and bought a few bags of Kingsford charcoal. I carried my new cooking partner to my backyard and placed it next to my grill. Saturday could not arrive soon enough.
Charcoal was the brainchild of Henry Ford. In addition to his many innovations and contributions to the automotive and ‘quotes for self dev’ industry, he also revolutionized the cooking field. Per the Kingsford Charcoal website “Mr. Ford wondered if all the wood waste generated by his sawmill and plants could be put to better use, and found his answer in a new process for pressing blocks of reconstituted char. While the innovative charcoal briquet was initially marketed under Ford’s own brand, it was eventually renamed Kingsford® Charcoal in Edward’s honor”*. Alongside this information on the Kingsford website is a picture of a daper, modern dad who favors Jamie Lanister from G.O.T. He is loading charcoal into his grill with his ‘presumed’ son (who does not favor king Joffrey), and probably chanting something like ‘BBQ is coming’.
Mindset: If you only take or recall only one piece of information from this writing, may I suggest the following. Planning an event or day to use the smoker is more about creating an ambiance that encourages the anticipation, enjoyment and fulfillment of cooking food (slowly) for a group. There is something both primitive and intrinsic about the smell of smoke combined with the aroma of meat that brings people together. I feel this is the case for several reasons both tangible and abstract.
Planning an event or day to use the smoker is more about creating an ambiance that encourages the anticipation, enjoyment and fulfillment of cooking food (slowly) for a group.
- The vast majority of the work takes place prior to and when the food is put on the smoker. This often results is more time socializing and ‘passively’ cooking. One can leverage this in a great many social situations to one’s advantage. Benjamin Franklin once stated that “guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days”. I think we can agree that there are some guests that for whatever reason tend to be more bearable and perhaps delightful in small, say…… 20 minute, increments. Should you find yourself in such a situation, you now have a legitimate reason to step outside and tend to the food. What’s more, your actions may be interpreted as a form of servitude by said company. I see this as a ‘win win’ because the social break often serves as a behavioral metaphor. When I step outside the house alone I am often stepping outside of myself. The chain of thoughts that were in motion are now paused and available for reflection. Was I truly listening; or perhaps just waiting to be heard? I return from such semi sabbaticals with a slightly renewed sense of awareness and vigor. Or, perhaps it’s just a heightened sense of hunger and anticipation for the bounty to come. Either way, the resulting sentiment is a beautiful box that remains a better gift when unopened.
2: An additional advantage to the lopsided labor of a smoker is that it serves as a social lubricant. It enables and encourages sincere dialogue much like a smooth whiskey cocktail would, but without the deleterious effects. Granted such topics start with generally accepted social banter such as “Does the college we hoped or pretended to attend have a shot at the playoffs this year?” However, after a few hours of sharing the aromas and permitting the shared illusion that your guest are somehow adding value to the meal with statements such as “Yes, I agree, it will need a few coals soon…….don’t let it get cold”, the environment is fertile for more profound conversations.
3: BBQ Synergy: If, when in good company, one were to combine the ambiance of the smoker with a quality bourbon and perhaps a cigar, there is now an enhanced backdrop that promotes life changing insights and moments. Dialogue that once resembled your child’s favorite youtube video gaming channel has been elevated to what one might expect when eavesdropping on an imaginary conversation between Mark twain and CS Lewis regarding Mississippi existentialism. It is in such environments that food, or perhaps the art of its proper preparation, cultivates us. When raising children, there are ironic moments where we find that in spite of all our knowledge, power and experience, we are the students. Food can work similarly and thus ‘prep’ us for seasons of our lives. It can play the underrated co star which serves to enhance our experience. It’s the proverbial George Costanza. It’s not the center of focus, but remove it from the social equation and there now exists a void which must be filled in order for us to achieve cohesion.
Factors which can make or break your meal
Coal: Managing the coal and heat will test your patience to the point of madness. Legend has it that Anchiale was the Greek Titan goddess of the warming heat of fire. Let me warn you that she is quite temperamental. Think of managing the wind for the competitive type A Sailboat captain. There are days where it just seems to work in your favor seamlessly. Then, when you are cursing the coals you recall those pleasant experiences and realize just how rare they actually occur. A piece of advice here. Control as much ambient temperature as possible. For example, if its a cold fall morning and you are fortunate enough to have a garage or a somewhat enclosed area that protects from wind or has a warmer temperature, use it. Cheap entry level smokers are not well insulated and thus ambient temps could very well be the difference between failure and success. Use every advantage possible to control the cooking temperature of your food.
Quick footnote. Prometheus is credited with stealing the fire from Anchiale in the heavens and giving it to men on earth. That would credit Prometheus as the father of modern BBQ. My question here, Why has noone named a model of Grill or Smoker ‘The Prometheus’?. That seems like a marketable pitch but then I spent my youth convinced that baseball cards were a sound financial investment. Additional footnote: One can slide baseball cards through the small gap of the smoker door without even opening it. This is a good way to add to your fire without losing any heat ;-(
Water bowl: AKA Breeder of Blisters
Designed to steam and keep your food moist. The water bowl resides just above the coals and below the lowest rack of food. Due to poor design and placement, one tends to think that one can take this bowl, add water and return it to its place safely. One would be mistaken. It’s just tempting you because it’s slightly possible (Inconceivable!). Think of those old school games in arcades and gas stations where there are piles of quarters being pushed to the edge. You think your quarter will be the one that is the tipping point? What is much more likely to occur is that you will burn your hand whilst trying to place the full water bowl back in place. This will result in water spilling on your hot coals. The temperature inside the smoker will drop and you will work frantically to try and get the heat back up. This results in unwelcome adjustments to your planned finish time as well as a great many awkward conversations such as “Oh, did I say we were eating at 2:00? What I meant was that we would be serving our third round of tasteless appetizers fresh from a box or a bag around that time……inconceivable!”.
Food Rack(s): Whatever geometry and algebra skills you may have retained from schooling will come in handy here. Unless you are cooking for a small crowd, you will attempt to leverage every square inch of this round platform in order to make the most of your investment of time and prayers. Beer Can chickens sit upright. Ribs generally sit in a rack but can be slightly bent. Brisket is large and cumbersome, but will shrink to nearly half the size by the time you are done. The meats that require the most time to cook should sit closer to the heat source. There’s also the fact that you can wrap many of the meats in aluminum foil after being exposed to smoke for a while. This benefit is twofold as it helps retain the moisture in the meat while also making your meats into some form of stackable bbq legos or high protein version of jenga.
Game theory is a branch of mathematics concerned with the analysis of strategies for dealing with competitive situations where the outcome of a participant’s choice of action depends critically on the actions of other participants. For the purposes of this story, the other participants are meats, coals, a smoker and ambient temperature. An example of my BBQ ‘game theory’ is as follows. I might cook brisket and ribs on a lower rack for 4 hours, then wrap them in aluminum foil and move them to the upper rack. This process requires you to have the lid of the smoker open for a few minutes which means you have now lost most of the heat contained in the smoker. The sunk cost of heat loss makes this an ideal time to proceed with adding in your meats which do not require as many hours to cook. Typically a few beer can chickens and maybe a few sausages to smoke. One could serve the sausages as an appetizer and by the time the chickens are finished, all the food should be juicy, fall-from-the-bone tender and ready to serve. Scientist at Google are still hard at work leveraging technologies such as AI and Machine Learning to build an algorithm for the optimal placement, pairings and cooking time of meat. Until they share their findings with the world, feel free to use my Quantum BBQ model.
Air Vents: These are placed in the hood of the device to control airflow. The idea is that the more you open them, the more air that circulates which should, in theory, raise the temperature in the smoker. My experience with this technology led me to believe it was some type of social experiment where scientist sat in the distance with binoculars observing frustrated men playing with various degrees of ventilation. They then publish the study under the heading “The illusion of control: Statistical proof that males who reason with their mouths open are more susceptible to the most primitive of placebos”. Feel free to try opening your vents all the way when you need the temperature to rise, but realize that it may very well be a fool’s errand. BBQ Hack: Credit for this hack goes to the chefs at Modernist Cuisine. Are you having trouble getting your coals to burn and heat up the smoker? As long as noone is looking, one of the best methods I know of is to aim a hair dryer at the base of the coals. The air will feed the flames and your coals will quickly become so hot that even tony Robbins would balk at the idea of walking over them. This is yet another situation in which leveraging technology can bests the gods of random chance. Take that Anchiale! I once taught this trick to a friend when we were having trouble getting his campfire going. I lent him my battery powered air mattress inflator and he aimed it at the base of the fire. A minute later we had a roaring campfire. It was so handy that the next day he decided to incorporate this trick again only this time he decided he needed that minute to ‘multitask’ and he braced the inflator near the flames and walked away. I returned to the campfire and mentioned a strange smell. I looked down to see my inflator had met an ironic kamikaze style fate. It fed the flames until they became so big it melted the device. RIP little blow bro…
Tips for Success:
Start early. Have your meat prepped, rubbed and ready on a baking tray covered with plastic wrap prior to your planned start time. This is two fold. 1: Prepwork generally takes longer than most people would expect so save yourself the worry by doing this ahead of time. 2: It allows the spices and marinades more time to permeate the meat prior to being cooked. If I am planning to start the smoker in the early hours, e.g. 5am, then I will generally complete this step the prior evening.
Plan to start your charcoal at least 45 minutes before the cooking timer starts. It can take a few tries to get enough of a ‘base’ of hot coals and YMMV. I used an electric starter rod, but a charcoal chimney is at least as effective.
Think of how much time your food needs to be on the smoker and always add an extra hour. Summer months are more forgiving, but remember, if it finishes early you can always transfer the finished product to your oven and keep it warm until it is served.
Materials
Wood Chips: Determine what smoke flavor you want and purchase the appropriate wood chips. A loose guideline/ wives tale is that beef favors woods such as hickory and mesquite while pork and chicken favor apple or pecan. Soak your wood chips in water for an hour before you use them. This will keep the smoke release steady and allow for a deeper penetration of smoke flavor. Done right, you can achieve the much sought after ‘smoke ring’ in your food.
Smoke ring on a piece of sliced Brisket
Charcoal: A large bag should more than suffice for a day of smoking. There are varying theories out there regarding the quantity (number of coals), and timing (how often to add the coals). I’ve had various friends swear by methods such as ‘Just adding 4 coals every hour’. Regardless of your approach, the goal is to keep the temperature of the smoker as close to your target temp, generally 225 to 250, for the duration of the cooking time.
There are various methods for stacking the odds of steady heat in your favor such as ‘The burn-down method’. This is where you fill the charcoal bed with unlit coals and add only a few lit coals to the very top. The idea is that the coals on top will slowly light those below them and burn down slowly over time. My advice is to experiment and adjust accordingly.
Aluminum Foil: Keep plenty of this on hand. It ties heavily into the ‘BBQ Game Theory’ section mentioned earlier. With foods like ‘beer can chicken’, you most likely will not need it because the skin seals in the moisture and it cooks in a few hours. On the other hand with foods like Brisket and ribs, wrapping in aluminum foil after a few hours can be the difference between a jumbo sized chunk of beef jerky and a tender, juicy and flavorful cut of meat. Random thought here….why do we always refer to it as aluminum foil? Four extra syllables to describe a one syllable item which needs no introduction seems excessive….but….. I digress.
Time the application of aluminum foil to take place after the food has had enough time to absorb some smoke flavoring as well as form a rich dark color on the exterior. Cooking hack: Once these two steps have taken place. You can wrap the food tightly in aluminum foil and finish them in an environment with stable heat control like say…… your oven. Yes, I know this can be viewed as bbq sacrilege, but keep this in mind on occasions where you run into issues such as cold weather, rain or getting angry and kicking the smoker harder than intended.
Summary :
The aforementioned are simply factors and insights which I hope will lead you to having a successful BBQ experience. However, what truly makes the experience of a BBQ afternoon is embracing the process of learning while setting a stage to share that experience with friends. Yes, that can sometimes mean you need to make peace with ‘sub-south’ standards of results. However, in the right company with a proper amount of perspective and a few dashes of optimism, you can emerge with a sense of accomplishment, memories with friends and perhaps an Instagram worthy entree.
References
Charcoal backstory
Smoke Ring picture
